Katie insisted on letting my vocalcords heal.I was getting antsy about not being at work and I wanted to check inwith my secretary Jillian. I snuck into the room next to mine and founda phone I could use. I called Jillian. When she answered I told her itwas me, Paul Mangione and I was feeling better.Jillian said in a cold sounding voice, "Can you please hold one second,Miss.". That took me back a bit, however when she returned to the phoneis when I really started to realize how much my voice had changed."Hello, this is not funny! My boss is Paul Mangione, a man! He isgravely ill! Do not call here again, Miss...who...whoever you are! Or Iwill have to get the police involved!" Jillian said in a particularlynasty voice!I was quite shocked. Jillian has known me for 6 years. For her not torecognize my voice, wow. For her to think it was a woman, double wow!When I saw my wife that afternoon she could see I was very upset. Katieasked me what was wrong.I answered her saying "What is wrong?. Can't take any more."Loggins nodded, trying to sound sympathetic. "I know you can handle this. You're a good crewman." Woman," Ben corrected. "Crew _woman_." He wiped at another tear as his forced humor failed. After a moment, he looked at the captain. "Dammit," he said, frustration boiling through his words and tone. "These fuckin' hormones are making me feel like I can't control my emotions any more! Doc says it's normal in ... pregnant women." He shook his head, wiping at his tears and he fought the urge to start crying. "I _hate_ this!" he cried out. "Why me? Why did this have to happen to me?" He turned from the captain, embarrassed by the show of 'soft' emotions more associated with women than with macho men. "What's going to happen to me? When we get home, I mean?"The captain shook his head sadly, his neutral expression failing to hold and giving way to uncertainty. "I don't know," he answered honestly."They'll quarantine me, won't they," Ben answered his own.
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